Here’s a research project the Ivy League has just tackled that people outside the Ivies have been onto for generations. “Researchers with the Brown University Center for Alcohol and Addiction Studies gave subjects alcohol on an empty stomach, let them sleep and then checked their ability to think in the morning,” The Washington Post Express reported on Tuesday December 29, 2009. “Although the subjects thought they’d be fine behind the wheel of a car, the researchers found they should probably wait a few more hours.”

I wonder if they had a hard time finding these “subjects.” W. C. Fields could have saved them the trouble.

Malcolm A. Kline is the executive director of Accuracy in Academia.